Courtesy of Radio originally, though Damon has to take the blame, since he told me he’d be interested in seeing my answers.

Oh, the office being down to two people today, so no managers around, also deserves credit for this.

1.EVER BEEN GIVEN AN ENGAGEMENT RING?

Nope. Never received one, never given one. Might do within the next year or two though.

2. LONGEST RELATIONSHIP:
The current one. I’ve no idea how we’ve put up with each other, but we have and it’s all plain sailing now. We’re pretty much chalk and cheese though, and I’m sure our respective friends would’ve been able to predict the type of person we’d end up with

3. LAST GIFT YOU RECEIVED:
I think it must be a book called “50 Mathematical Ideas You Really Need To Know”, which was given to me by Radio. Excellent stuff

4. EVER DROPPED A MOBILE PHONE?
Sure. They tend to drop out of my pocket when I drive. Mind you, that’s not as bad as when a pair of scissors flew out of my pocket once and dropped three falls below. That wasn’t a good couple of seconds knowing that they were in flight and might land on someone

5. WHEN’S THE LAST TIME YOU WORKED OUT?
About three weeks ago, which means the hard work done in the preceding week was all for naught

6. THINGS YOU SPEND A LOT OF MONEY ON:
I don’t tend to hand over large chunks of money. I buy books like Imelda Marcos purchases shoes though, so it all adds up.

7. LAST FOOD YOU ATE:
A banana immediately prior to starting this response.

8. FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX:
It depends. I’m hardly going to write “bum” or “tits” for somebody I don’t find attractive, am I? A cute nose tends to get me, even if the rest of the body attached to is isn’t perfect.

9. ONE FAVORITE SONG:
Gehennah: King Of The Sidewalk.

10. WHERE DO YOU LIVE?
Leicester. All being well Radio and I will get a place in that unlikely arena Nuneaton, courtesy of it being most equitably placed railway-serviced location between our home towns.

11. HIGH SCHOOL YOU ATTENDED:
I’m from Leicester where we do high school in two stages. 11-14 was Winstanley, 14-18 was Lutterworth Grammar.

12. CELL PHONE SERVICE PROVIDER:
3.

13. FAVORITE SHOP:
Amazon. I shop online

14. LONGEST JOB YOU HAD:
Minus a break of a year, I’ve been at my current job for 5.75 years. I finally got my compulsory ID badge yesterday

15. DO YOU OWN A PAIR OF DICE?
Nope.

16. DO YOU PRANK CALL PEOPLE?:
Nope.

17. LAST WEDDING YOU ATTENDED:
Hannah and Steven’s.

18. FIRST FRIEND YOU’D CALL IF YOU WON THE LOTTERY:
No-one, since I don’t play the blasted thing! If I were to come into money in some strange unforeseen windfall, I’d phone Radio and tell her to jack her job in.

19. LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR BEST FRIEND(S):
Last Thursday. I hadn’t seen Camel in months and it was GREAT to have a get-together, especially as we were basking in Obama’s win.

I might visit Big J or Linz this evening.

20. FAVORITE FAST FOOD RESTAURANT:
I don’t tend to go often but I have enjoyed Burger King immensely on those rare occasions that I’ve been there. Well, except for the clientèle, obviously.

21. BIGGEST LIE YOU HAVE EVER HEARD:
I know of someone who had me believe they were not long for this world. It was a bad thing, but forgiveable, especially given the circumstances that they were facing at the time.

22. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES?
Blondes.

23. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL MOST OFTEN?
I very rarely speak on the phone, unless it’s work. Dunno.

24. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST JOB?
I was a paperboy for five years, getting up at 05:45 six days a week for the princely sum of 60p a day.

25. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS SURVEY?
Eating a banana and ranting about some dick in payroll who keeps on phoning Alex because he messes things up and then tries to shift the blame.

26. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Probably have an inch or two added to my shinbones. They’re proportionately short, so my legs look weird and I’m taken from being “medium height” to “short”.

27. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS SURVEY?
Because Damon left a note on Radio’s Facebook page saying that he’d like to see me answer this.

28. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?
A nice telephone manner (unless you’re a telesales jack-off, in which case you pay the price for disturbing me and lying to me when you say “We know that your mobile contract is coming to an end …”) and my computer output.

29. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?
Act the philosopher by stroking my chin and saying “But of course. If alcohol were discovered today it would never have been made legal.”

30. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
Radio’s not the maternal type, so it’s a bit of a non-starter. Further complicating the matter is that I would have to come off my meds that keep my hair if I wanted to have kids. This is the guy who once yelled at Camel “I’d rather be DEAF than bald!” when Camel tried to tell him that losing his hair wasn’t the end of the world, so there’s probably not much scope for a mini-me to be running around.

31. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
Nope. I’m rational. Use brain.

32. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Normally yes, though the fact that I rarely handwrite now has taken its toll. If I take the time to be tidy, I tend to think that mine is rather good. I, however, rarely take any time

33. WHEN DID YOU LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY?
April 2000 to a French girlfriend who made me wait NINE days. I’d had a few attempts over the preceding years, always being spoiled by parents being around, the wrong time of the month, the girl changing her mind, or (more commonly) my abrasive personality.

34. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
It depends. If my only exposure was to the bad side of me, I probably wouldn’t. In the main, I’d like me and think I was a good guy, but I wouldn’t be friends as such on the basis that Tim has become stand-offish in his old age, seeing socialising as a chore that eats into reading time.

35. DO LOOKS MATTER?
Looks don’t define a person’s spirit or goodness of heart. In looking for a partner, looks are a great plus and I probably wouldn’t take the time to get to know a person with two heads, but superficial stuff it remains. Nonetheless, I remain in awe at how good looking Hannah is

36. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
Shooting. With the mouth, not a gun. It doesn’t matter if it’s an animate object either: A teapot has been verbally abused in public before

If someone sets me off online, I might type a pretty savage response. More often than not, I press delete rather than send, which gets the anger out of my system without causing further problems.

In real life I can get pretty aggressive. I’ve not thrown a punch since I was 14, although a few altercations have led to a scuffle and a controlled choke. Camel had to explain to me the other day that this wasn’t normal behaviour, because I’ve always thought of controlled aggression and disabling an opponent as being better than fighting with fists and weapons like other people do, but apparently people wouldn’t think so. They seem to prefer fists flailing to controlled action, I dunno.

37. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
The office. A lot less than it used to be though

Mind you, Big J’s mum has a room called “Tim’s room”, even though I only use it twice a year.

38. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
I judge people on their merits. I don’t necessarily think that others lie so much as their vision is coloured, so I might not take things that they say as gospel, but I don’t inherently distrust most people.

39. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Well that’s a *great* question.

40. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT?
Yup. I used to treat moshing as a test of manliness, always going as hard and fast as possible, no matter how much it hurt. I never liked doing it at gigs though, especially when the nazis used to go there purely to hurt people.

41. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?

Big J still calls me Moosedog, Radio calls me Babel, a couple of the girls at work call me Ugly. That’s about it.

42. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOUR?
Probably mint-choc chip, though some of these mixtures are excellent.

43. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?
None. They’ve never burst through.

44. CAN YOU COOK?
Yep.

45. WHAT CAR DO YOU DRIVE?
The Moosemobile, a leather-bedecked tempest-grey Rover 25. My pride and joy.

46. BEST DATE YOU’VE EVER BEEN ON:
I genuinely can’t think of one. I don’t know whether it counts as a date, but the girl who would that night become my girlfriend in France came from the countryside to Toulouse to see me, and that was a magical day, probably amongst my favourite ever.

47. LAST TIME YOU CRIED:
When somebody I cared for was expected to die imminently over the course of my birthday, and I very maturely handled the pressure by drinking four bottles of wine for breakfast. I’m not a crier and tend to be unkind to others when they do.

48. MOST DISLIKED FOODS:
These little lettuce things called endives. I think they’re called “gem lettuce” or something similar in English. I’ve tried on a few occasions to eat them, but they genuinely taste to me as I would think a sweaty sock would taste.

49. LONGEST SHIFT YOU HAVE WORKED AT A JOB:
15 hours on paper. I have worked all through the night before though, having under two hours’ sleep before heading back to work. Longest week on my timesheet was 92.25 hours.

50. FAVORITE MOVIES:
The Star Wars stuff and the Back To The Future trilogy.

51. CAN YOU SING?
I can hit about three notes. If the song involves only those notes, I can sing it. Most songs don’t involve those notes, in which case you don’t want to be around when I’m trying to sing along with them.

52. LAST FIGHT?
Last argument I suppose was last week, when a paranoid man included me in his ramblings online and tried to start trouble. I wrote a five-page rebuttal sonning him, but elected not to inflame the situation by actually posting it.

Last physical skirmish would’ve been in Sweden. The group of us were used to slapping others who weren’t paying attention, but one of them took it too far by hitting me in the face, so he was taken down and restrained. The thing that stands out about it is that Big J’s instinct when it kicked off was to grab a camera and photo it, rather than getting stuck in!

53.ONE THING YOU NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE WITHOUT:
My shoes. I had a bit of hard skin on my foot which I thought might be a verucca, so I’ve taken a lump out of my foot just in case. We have tonnes of lose gravel outside, so the shoes are staying on whilst there’s a hole for the gravel to get in.

54. FAVOURITE ITEM:
I’d be dead without my laptop. I love the Moosemobile more though.

55. LAPTOP OR DESKTOP COMPUTER?
I find laptop keyboards harder to use, but love the mobility that a laptop gives me. Laptop takes the win.

56. DO YOU SMOKE?
I’d have to say that I do, but in the same way that lots of people drink without being alcoholics. I can do months without a cigarette then decide I‘d quite like one, in which case I’d have it. Usually only have menthol cigarettes though.

57. SLEEP WITH OR WITHOUT CLOTHES?
Off normally. At the most it would just be underwear.

58. WHO SLEEPS WITH YOU EVERY NIGHT?
No-one. Radio soon enough I hope.

59. DO LONG-DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS WORK?
On the basis that I have one, I have to answer that they can.

60. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BEEN PULLED OVER BY THE POLICE?
Twice whilst driving.

61. DO YOU LIKE COFFEE?
If there’s a tonne of milk and sugar in there, and next to no coffee, sure.

62 HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?
Fried, with a runny yolk.

63. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY?
Of course not. I consider it a slap in the face to our education system that anybody even reads that garbage.

64. LAST PERSON ON YOUR MISSED CALL LIST:
The manager of the childcare team. She phoned back a minute later. It was to see whether I wanted breakfast ordering.

65. WHAT WAS THE LAST TEXT MESSAGE YOU RECEIVED?
From my cousin. I texted her this morning to say that Radio and I have a free weekend and would be happy to visit her in Cambridge if she’s free. “Hey u.God im so gutted im not there this wkend but my ma is.I’ll ring u later.Spk soon.X” Nothing like my own texting style.

66. NUMBER OF PILLOWS?
Two.

67. WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?
The same stuff I always wear. A green hoodie with black combats.

68. CAN YOU PLAY POOL?
Yup, though a lot less well than I actually think at the time. I can legitimately say that I once won a match by chipping the white over another ball and landing it in the right spot to send the black into a pocket. I’ve never replicated it.

69. DO YOU LIKE MAPS?
Sure, especially ones from centuries ago. I’d love to have one on a wall.

70. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SEASON?
I like the Winter and Autumn. I love coming into the house wet, the central heating already on to greet me, and a shower and change making me feel in two minutes better than people who pay fortunes for massages feel in two hours.

71. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP THIS MORNING?
05:30. I was due into work at 06:30. I don’t mind at all, since it means that I finish earlier, but I’m a very nervous sleeper with these early starts, waking up during the night to double-check that I’ve not overslept.

72. BEST THING ABOUT WINTER:
Things slow down. Hot food is on the table and the inside of the house seems like a refuge rather than the infernal prison that Summer causes it to be.

73. LAST TIME A COPPER GAVE YOU A TICKET?
The last time I got busted was April 2006.

74. DO YOU THINK PIRATES ARE COOL OR OVERRATED?
They’re ridiculously overrated. We have them now. Think about Somalian warships or junks in East Asia. There’s nothing glamorous in that life at all, and it’s ridiculous that we romanticise those pirates of yesteryear.

75. WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS WEEKEND?
It looks as though Radio and I will be off to visit my auntie overnight in Cambridge. I need to confirm it with her though, seeing as I never arrange anything in good time.

76. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE?
Settled. A professorship would be nice.

77. WHAT’S YOUR BIGGEST REGRET?
That I’ve probably only ever written a handful of job applications, and even though I recognise my marketability will still not apply for jobs to capitalise on it.

78: HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE?
I reckon so, though the older, wiser me suggests that those feelings in the stomach were more born of nervousness because I was never sure that I wouldn’t get dumped. I’m perfectly at ease with Radio, and it seems that we’re more two friends that love one another and are totally at ease together. That seems to bode much better for the future than all those occasions in the past where I held my tongue for fear of getting rejected.

79. ARE YOU SMILING?
I was actually pulling a face because I was listening to Alex take a call. The question made me smile though.

80: DO YOU PREFER TO SMILE WITH A TOOTHY GRIN OR A CLOSED MOUTH?
Photos seem to be toothy.

81. DO YOU MISS SOMEONE RIGHT NOW?
Nope. I’m perfectly happy in my own company.

82. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD WHERE WOULD IT BE?
Realistically, I *can* go anywhere in the world. I would live to visit Italy one day, just because I’m totally in adoration of the language. I really must head back to my old stamping grounds in Toulouse at some point.

83. DO YOU HAVE A HIGH SEX-DRIVE?
Haha! This is a genuine happening from the last day of our holiday in Geneva:

Radio: Babel? (Gives the look)

Tim: Huh? Oh, for fuck’s sake! I’ve just had a shower!

I think that just about says it all.

84. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH?
Nope, not really, though I still have my favourite people.

85. NIGHT OR DAY?
If I could I’d never sleep again.

86. PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?
The guitar. I’m good at the one style that I can play, but not terribly good otherwise. The other musicians have to keep up with whatever pace I tend to switch to midsong.

87. DID YOU GO ON VACATION LAST MONTH?
I’m not a holiday person, so there’s no surprise in my answer there

88. DO YOU HAVE SISTERS/BROTHERS?
One sister, Juice, and two brothers, Mass and Egg.

89. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO JAIL?
Nearly. Not anything I’m proud of. Interestingly I would’ve preferred prison to community service, had I been ordered to do that. I was relieved to get just a fine.

90. DO YOU WISH YOU COULD SEE ANYONE IN PARTICULAR RIGHT NOW?
I’m not a terribly emotional person. I am, however, counting down the clock because I get to see my nephew today.

91. FAVOURITE SPORT?
‘“Sport”’ would be wrestling. “Sport” would be, I suppose, football things, but only if it’s a summary programme of a season or a documentary on a world cup or great player or something. Actually, I don’t follow rugby, but I always enjoyed watching it on those rare occasions that I saw it in the early 90s.

92. YOUR HAIR COLOUR?
It’s close to black at the minute. I was going to write “dull, non-descript mousey brown” but it’s darker than that.

93. YOUR EYE COLOUR?
Hazel around the pupil merging to green at the iris. (Or the other way round. I can’t see them to check.)

94. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES?
No, but I’d quite like too.

95. YOU LIKE SUSHI?
Never tried it. I highly doubt that I ever will as the thought leaves me shuddering.

96. LAST THING YOU WATCHED:
“Nikolai & The Sheik”, something on YouTube, where The Iron Sheik has to solve a series of murders.

97. FAVOURITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
With hindsight, Christmas. I’m not a Christmas person normally, but I must admit to looking forward to it this year, and I can’t think of any regular day when we’re all together happy, and get stuff.

98. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
Nope. I spent every possible occasion over the course of several years doing it to Rolf’s sister, no matter how many people were around to laugh at me

99. STRANGEST PLACE HAD SEX?
In a wood in Herzberg-am-Harz, the Esperanto-urbo.

100. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO AFTER THIS SURVEY?
Get ready to go home having done precisely no work all day. Best workday ever!

Tags: Quiz

This entry was posted on Friday, November 14th, 2008 at 7:39 pm and is filed under Personal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.